death

Death is Heartless

I don’t want to write tonight. I don’t want to write in the same way that sometimes I don’t want to go out and run. On those days, it’s usually a mile or two into the run that I realize lacing up is exactly what I needed. I have a feeling this is going to be very much the same way…

We have had a lot of joys over the last few months. Kortney and I have had countless moments where God moved one thing here and another thing there, and presto we’re standing there jaw-dropped in amazement. I like to share those times because I’m someone who tends to celebrate joys more than I do sorrows (I think most of us are that way, but we all know folks who are quite the opposite). Speaking of sorrows, I had someone who I respect quite a bit “challenge” me one time as he mentioned that my life looks pretty good, from afar. He’s kept up with things that I share on social media and he alluded to me only sharing the pretty stuff in my life (and he wasn’t just talking about my better half).

But life has a lot of downs, doesn’t it? And I know that people reading this will immediately go extreme and begin to worry about me, especially with a title like this post has… but I’m simply calling out that there are hard times in life. Beyond social media, you may know that I process things pretty heavily. I’m a thinker. When people talk to me about something serious or strategic, I usually just take it all in quietly (quite the opposite if you get me joking around). What I’m getting at in all of this rambling — and probably the reason I don’t speak about serious stuff unless I know exactly what I want to say — my knee-jerk response is to share the fun, the loving, the redemptive but to internalize the stuff that isn’t polished, the stuff that is gritty, or the stuff that is difficult to talk about. Well, I’m mentally stewing on something this week and it isn’t fun at all.

A friend of mine unexpectedly passed away a couple of days ago. I’m not able to share details, but two things I’m learning from this is the spontaneity and the finality of death. About a week ago, we went to lunch together and laughed as we exchanged stories about our lives and our jobs. And just a couple of days ago, we texted back and forth about social media marketing. And the next day after texting that I heard of her passing. I hate how final the news of her passing is and, though I don’t think I’d change anything about the last time that we spoke, I walked away from that lunch assuming we’d catch up again another day. Death is heartless.

So while I apologize that this is a post weightier than others, I encourage you to not take for granted the times you see your friends, families, and loved ones. I’m as guilty as anyone but I beg you to put your phone down and listen when people are talking to you. Make time for others. And whether you’re spending time with your spouse, catching up with an old friend, or maybe even at work with new friends, challenge yourself to be in the moment as often as you can — life is made of moments.